Copyright © Carol Kaspszak
Home and Personal Security
http://HomeAndPersonalSecurity.com
Are you concerned about your personal safety whenever you go
shopping?
Things could go wrong just crossing the parking lot. You could
become a victim. Here are a few tips you should do to insure you
and your family's personal safety.
1. When parking your car make sure that you lock your doors.
Always park as close to the store as possible or in a highly
visible, well-lighted area. If you have any valuables such as
cell phones, purses, etc, keep them out of sight or locked in the
trunk. Also, make a mental note of where you parked so you don't
have to wander around the lot looking for your car.
2. When you are going to and from your car, be aware of your
surroundings. Scan the parking lot. Have your keys ready to
unlock your door. If you have an alarm on your keyless locks, be
prepared to use it. It is a great idea to purchase a personal
self defense device. Mace, Pepper Spray, or a 130db Personal
Alarm can come in handy if you are ever attacked. Use assertive
body language to discourage trouble. Look confident and be alert
to what is going on around you. When possible, wear clothes and
shoes that won't slow you down. Look around and under your car
as you approach it. Look in the front and back seats before you
get in. Once you are in your car, lock the doors immediately and
drive away. If you feel you are being followed, don't go home.
Go to the nearest safe location such as a crowded store or fire
station or to a police car.
3. If someone suspicious approaches your car, hit the horn until
they have been scared off or until you have attracted attention.
If you feel you are being followed, act like you know it. Turn
and look at the person. This gives you time to plan and lets the
stranger know you will not be taken by surprise.
4. When you are inside the store don't flash cash. Carry only
the amount of money or credit cards needed for your shopping trip
and keep it secure until you're ready to pay. Then put your
money away immediately before leaving the register. Do not leave
your purse unattended, even for a moment.
5. Your safety is important no matter where you go. Trust your
instincts. Unless it's absolutely necessary to carry a purse or
bag, keep your wallet or credit cards in your pocket. Eliminate
spare keys from your purse. Carry your belongings close to your
body. Hold it in front of you between your arm and body, but not
wrapped around your neck or looped around your wrist. Do not
leave your belongings in your car or otherwise unattended. Out
of sight, out of mind.
6. Avoid using ATMs that are isolated or away from the general
public. Do not go late at night or early in the morning.
Consider bringing a friend along when you use an ATM. Have your
card ready and plan your transaction before you reach the ATM.
If your life is threatened while using an ATM, cooperate fully
with the robber. Your life is more important than the money. Be
safe on the streets. Don't be the next victim.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Carol Kaspszak
Keeping women and families safe since 2003.
For all your safety needs, shop at:
http://HomeAndPersonalSecurity.com
http://HomeAndPersonalSecurityCameras.com
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Alone In the Crowd: How to Overcome Urban Isolation
Copyright © 1998-2006 Steve B. Reed
Psychotherapy Center
http://www.psychotherapy-center.com
The pain of loneliness never knew a stranger. It is the constant
companion of many a solitary soul. In this massive urban sprawl,
the shadow of isolation is upon countless individuals. Most of us
have felt the chill of loneliness. Some people even resign
themselves to a life-style of being alone. With so many people
around, it is ironic that connecting has become so difficult.
There are two key reasons this. One reason is sociological and
the other psychological.
For millennia, people lived in small rural villages. They had all
their family and extended family close by. They grew up, went to
school, worked, lived and eventually died with the same people.
They did not have to do anything to become a part of it all. They
were simply born into the close-nit, social fabric of a
community. During the last 100 years, society has undergone
profound changes that contribute to the problem of urban
isolation.
These sociological changes include four main factors. They are:
1. the migration of the population to large cities since the
industrial revolution;
2. the loss of extended family as advances in transportation
create an increasingly mobile society;
3. the breakdown of the nuclear family with the social acceptance
of divorce;
4. and the loss of history with people as close friends move away
to pursue education, jobs and promotions. We have not yet
developed the coping strategies to deal with these radical
changes.
Today people are trying to adjust and deal with loss, loneliness,
isolation, constant change, high-paced stressful jobs, single
parent families, blended families and the repeated necessity of
rebuilding ones social support system. Many people who go into
counseling are struggling with these issues.
One key antidote for urban isolation is membership in caring
groups that you find meaningful and enjoyable. Any topic of
interest is a catalyst around which people collect. You can join
many possible groups. Among them, one of the few instant sources
of caring community remaining in our society is the church. This
institution continues to play a great a role in people's lives,
socially as well as spiritually. In some of my seminars, I
suggest that people participate in at least three groups that
they can feel a sense of inclusion, acceptance and caring.
Membership does have its advantages.
However, not everyone is comfortable joining groups. There can be
psychological reasons that block a person from joining even
though they realize the benefits of a healthy support system.
Some people have traumatic experiences in their family of origin.
The family is the first group in which we have membership. If it
was not safe to be yourself, to have your thoughts and feelings,
with your family it may not feel safe to think of joining any
group.
Others have felt deeply hurt by a peer group that was attacking,
excluding or shaming. Such painful experiences can develop into a
phobia of social groups. If the thought of getting closely
involved in a group seems threatening and anxiety provoking, then
you may be experiencing this type of phobia.
Lastly, even if you do not have any traumatic associations with
groups, if you grew-up with parents who did, you may have learned
to be afraid of groups simply because they were afraid.
Many excellent treatments are now available in the field of
psychotherapy to help people resolve fears of closeness and
connection to individuals and groups. Any traumatic experience
with family or peer groups can benefit from some of the newer
trauma therapies. Treatments that have a high success rate
include the REMAP process, Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT),
and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR).
Research is showing these methods to be both faster and more
effective than the old ways of treating trauma that rely on talk
therapy alone.
Although these treatments represent recent advances in the field
of psychotherapy, a growing number of therapists are becoming
interested. Those who train in these approaches find that many
long-term problems can dissipate in short order. Rather than
years of therapy, many issues only take months. Sometimes, even
as little as one treatment session can make a difference.
Last year, one of my colleagues showed an interest in using the
REMAP process to treat her social phobia. In less than an hour
of treatment, she was already starting to feel better about her
life-long social fear. As the year went on, she kept telling me
about how much more comfortable she was feeling in groups. This
was after just one treatment session.
This shows that when you resolve these psychological blocks, the
quality of your life can improve almost instantly. This can
clear the way for you to enjoy further improvement in the quality
of your life by just adding people.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Steve B. Reed, LPC, LMSW, LMFT is a psychotherapist that
specializes in treating trauma and anxiety disorders including
social phobia. He treats people at his Richardson, Texas
office (Dallas area) and through phone counseling worldwide.
You can reach Steve at 972-997-9955 or through his website at:
http://www.psychotherapy-center.com
copyright 1998-2006, Steve B. Reed
Psychotherapy Center
http://www.psychotherapy-center.com
The pain of loneliness never knew a stranger. It is the constant
companion of many a solitary soul. In this massive urban sprawl,
the shadow of isolation is upon countless individuals. Most of us
have felt the chill of loneliness. Some people even resign
themselves to a life-style of being alone. With so many people
around, it is ironic that connecting has become so difficult.
There are two key reasons this. One reason is sociological and
the other psychological.
For millennia, people lived in small rural villages. They had all
their family and extended family close by. They grew up, went to
school, worked, lived and eventually died with the same people.
They did not have to do anything to become a part of it all. They
were simply born into the close-nit, social fabric of a
community. During the last 100 years, society has undergone
profound changes that contribute to the problem of urban
isolation.
These sociological changes include four main factors. They are:
1. the migration of the population to large cities since the
industrial revolution;
2. the loss of extended family as advances in transportation
create an increasingly mobile society;
3. the breakdown of the nuclear family with the social acceptance
of divorce;
4. and the loss of history with people as close friends move away
to pursue education, jobs and promotions. We have not yet
developed the coping strategies to deal with these radical
changes.
Today people are trying to adjust and deal with loss, loneliness,
isolation, constant change, high-paced stressful jobs, single
parent families, blended families and the repeated necessity of
rebuilding ones social support system. Many people who go into
counseling are struggling with these issues.
One key antidote for urban isolation is membership in caring
groups that you find meaningful and enjoyable. Any topic of
interest is a catalyst around which people collect. You can join
many possible groups. Among them, one of the few instant sources
of caring community remaining in our society is the church. This
institution continues to play a great a role in people's lives,
socially as well as spiritually. In some of my seminars, I
suggest that people participate in at least three groups that
they can feel a sense of inclusion, acceptance and caring.
Membership does have its advantages.
However, not everyone is comfortable joining groups. There can be
psychological reasons that block a person from joining even
though they realize the benefits of a healthy support system.
Some people have traumatic experiences in their family of origin.
The family is the first group in which we have membership. If it
was not safe to be yourself, to have your thoughts and feelings,
with your family it may not feel safe to think of joining any
group.
Others have felt deeply hurt by a peer group that was attacking,
excluding or shaming. Such painful experiences can develop into a
phobia of social groups. If the thought of getting closely
involved in a group seems threatening and anxiety provoking, then
you may be experiencing this type of phobia.
Lastly, even if you do not have any traumatic associations with
groups, if you grew-up with parents who did, you may have learned
to be afraid of groups simply because they were afraid.
Many excellent treatments are now available in the field of
psychotherapy to help people resolve fears of closeness and
connection to individuals and groups. Any traumatic experience
with family or peer groups can benefit from some of the newer
trauma therapies. Treatments that have a high success rate
include the REMAP process, Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT),
and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR).
Research is showing these methods to be both faster and more
effective than the old ways of treating trauma that rely on talk
therapy alone.
Although these treatments represent recent advances in the field
of psychotherapy, a growing number of therapists are becoming
interested. Those who train in these approaches find that many
long-term problems can dissipate in short order. Rather than
years of therapy, many issues only take months. Sometimes, even
as little as one treatment session can make a difference.
Last year, one of my colleagues showed an interest in using the
REMAP process to treat her social phobia. In less than an hour
of treatment, she was already starting to feel better about her
life-long social fear. As the year went on, she kept telling me
about how much more comfortable she was feeling in groups. This
was after just one treatment session.
This shows that when you resolve these psychological blocks, the
quality of your life can improve almost instantly. This can
clear the way for you to enjoy further improvement in the quality
of your life by just adding people.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Steve B. Reed, LPC, LMSW, LMFT is a psychotherapist that
specializes in treating trauma and anxiety disorders including
social phobia. He treats people at his Richardson, Texas
office (Dallas area) and through phone counseling worldwide.
You can reach Steve at 972-997-9955 or through his website at:
http://www.psychotherapy-center.com
copyright 1998-2006, Steve B. Reed
Overcoming The Fear Of Loneliness
Copyright © 2006 Stanley Popovich
http://www.managingfear.com/
A Layman's Guide to Managing Fear
Sometime or another we will experience a time when we are alone.
The first step is to become comfortable with yourself and having
the self-confidence that you will be able to manage being alone.
There is nothing wrong with being alone. If being alone bothers
you then seeing a counselor can help you with these issues.
In the meantime, here is a short list of techniques that a person
can use so that the fear of being alone doesn't become a major
issue in their lives.
The first step is to find an activity that you enjoy and where
you can meet a lot of people. For instance, joining a group
activity such as a volleyball group, women's club, or making
crafts can be a great way to meet people. Doing something that
you like to do will make you happy and will increase your chances
of making friends.
Spending time with animals can be a great source of
companionship. Having a dog or cat can make us feel loved. If
you don't own a dog or cat, then volunteer at the local animal
shelter. Spending time with an animal or pet can help us to feel
better and can be of good company to all of us whether we are
alone or not.
Helping others through community service can be of some help.
There are many people out there who could benefit from your time
and talents. Helping others can give you a source of pride, help
you feel better about yourself, and can provide long lasting
friendships. Give it a try and you will be surprised.
Challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and
realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your
lonely or depressed, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself
questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense. For
example, some people may think that if they are alone at the
present time then they will always be alone. This is not true.
Even if your alone today doesn't mean that you will be alone all
the time. No one can predict the future with one hundred percent
accuracy.
It isn't fun being alone, but sometimes there are worse things.
For instance, imagine that you are married or stuck in a
relationship that you can't get out of and also makes you
miserable. Not only do you have to live with this person, there
is no way to get out of the relationship because of various
financial or personal reasons. As a result, you are stuck living
with someone that you can't stand and makes you depressed every
single day of your life. With this viewpoint, being alone
doesn't sound that bad.
The important thing is to do something constructive. Sitting
around and doing nothing will not make things any better whether
it is dealing with the fear of being alone or something else. Go
out and do something that you like to do. In addition, take it
one day at a time and stay committed in trying to solve your
problem.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
BIOGRAPHY:
Stan Popovich is the author of "A Layman's Guide to Managing
Fear Using Psychology, Christianity and Non Resistant Methods"
- an easy to read book that presents a general overview of
techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears
and anxieties. For additional information go to:
http://www.managingfear.com/
http://www.managingfear.com/
A Layman's Guide to Managing Fear
Sometime or another we will experience a time when we are alone.
The first step is to become comfortable with yourself and having
the self-confidence that you will be able to manage being alone.
There is nothing wrong with being alone. If being alone bothers
you then seeing a counselor can help you with these issues.
In the meantime, here is a short list of techniques that a person
can use so that the fear of being alone doesn't become a major
issue in their lives.
The first step is to find an activity that you enjoy and where
you can meet a lot of people. For instance, joining a group
activity such as a volleyball group, women's club, or making
crafts can be a great way to meet people. Doing something that
you like to do will make you happy and will increase your chances
of making friends.
Spending time with animals can be a great source of
companionship. Having a dog or cat can make us feel loved. If
you don't own a dog or cat, then volunteer at the local animal
shelter. Spending time with an animal or pet can help us to feel
better and can be of good company to all of us whether we are
alone or not.
Helping others through community service can be of some help.
There are many people out there who could benefit from your time
and talents. Helping others can give you a source of pride, help
you feel better about yourself, and can provide long lasting
friendships. Give it a try and you will be surprised.
Challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and
realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your
lonely or depressed, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself
questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense. For
example, some people may think that if they are alone at the
present time then they will always be alone. This is not true.
Even if your alone today doesn't mean that you will be alone all
the time. No one can predict the future with one hundred percent
accuracy.
It isn't fun being alone, but sometimes there are worse things.
For instance, imagine that you are married or stuck in a
relationship that you can't get out of and also makes you
miserable. Not only do you have to live with this person, there
is no way to get out of the relationship because of various
financial or personal reasons. As a result, you are stuck living
with someone that you can't stand and makes you depressed every
single day of your life. With this viewpoint, being alone
doesn't sound that bad.
The important thing is to do something constructive. Sitting
around and doing nothing will not make things any better whether
it is dealing with the fear of being alone or something else. Go
out and do something that you like to do. In addition, take it
one day at a time and stay committed in trying to solve your
problem.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
BIOGRAPHY:
Stan Popovich is the author of "A Layman's Guide to Managing
Fear Using Psychology, Christianity and Non Resistant Methods"
- an easy to read book that presents a general overview of
techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears
and anxieties. For additional information go to:
http://www.managingfear.com/
Create Your Personal Success Equation!
Copyright © 2006 Kent Jacobson a.k.a. Mr. Success
Shortcut 2 Success
http://www.Shortcut2Success.com
Do you have any idea how to measure your success? I really had
not thought much about how to measure my success until I was
asked the same question. Some of my initial responses were;
money, power, paying off debts, raising children and so on. All
of these are factors in what I refer to as a success equation.
Ok, what is a success equation going to do for me? My answer,
to help keep you focused on the big success picture. To help you
answer and save you a little time, I need you to think about your
success factors (words, phrases or number's) that will
ultimately contribute to equation. Begin to formulate these
factors into a basic equation. Document your success equation so
you can refine it and refer to it frequently. I like to carry
mine around with me, because sometimes I need to refer back to
some of my factors and what they truly really mean to me.
Everyone's success equation will be different and your ultimate
success is dependent upon your personal or professional situation
and how well you assimilate your critical factors.
For this discussion, I will share with you my personal success
equation and how I developed it. By the time you finish reading
this article, I want you to create you own success equation,
believe in the factors you document and implement actions to be
successful.
My success equation (Success=F+F+F+O+P) involves five equal
factors.
* Faith - Believe in a higher presence
* Family - There is no greater priority
* Failure - Do not be afraid of failure, learn and grow from it
* Optimism - Maintain a positive outlook
* Perseverance - Relentlessly pursue your dreams and goals and
recognize opportunities
The first step in developing your equation is listing key factors
(words and phrases) that are important to you. Initially, put
down all your thoughts, then review and eliminate the less
critical ones until you have five to seven factors. To many or to
few may lead to conflicting decisions or priorities. This is why
I recommend you initially omit money from your equation, your
choice.
The second step is to review your factors during the next few
weeks as you interact with family, friends, business associates
etc. Document and carry with you your success equations during
this time fame. As you progress through your normal routine,
allow yourself time to reflect on the factors you have
identified. Ask yourself, are my decisions and actions are
consistent with these factors? Do I need to change my behavior or
maybe a factor? Keep notes; do not be quick to change anything
until at least a week has passed. This is your development and
learning period; there is no need to rush this step.
Third and final step is to critically review your success
equation. Look back through the notes and experiences from the
second step. Refine your success equation, document the final
result and carry it with you. That's it your on the way!
I close this article with one my favorite quotes from Pope John
Paul II, he said, "The future starts today, not tomorrow."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Kent Jacobson, a.k.a. "Mr. Success" is a trusted authority in the
success field and provides valuable success information for free
through his website at: http://www.Shortcut2Success.com . You can
also read Kent's Success Blog to find more success secrets at:
http://www.Shortcut2Success.com/blog
Shortcut 2 Success
http://www.Shortcut2Success.com
Do you have any idea how to measure your success? I really had
not thought much about how to measure my success until I was
asked the same question. Some of my initial responses were;
money, power, paying off debts, raising children and so on. All
of these are factors in what I refer to as a success equation.
Ok, what is a success equation going to do for me? My answer,
to help keep you focused on the big success picture. To help you
answer and save you a little time, I need you to think about your
success factors (words, phrases or number's) that will
ultimately contribute to equation. Begin to formulate these
factors into a basic equation. Document your success equation so
you can refine it and refer to it frequently. I like to carry
mine around with me, because sometimes I need to refer back to
some of my factors and what they truly really mean to me.
Everyone's success equation will be different and your ultimate
success is dependent upon your personal or professional situation
and how well you assimilate your critical factors.
For this discussion, I will share with you my personal success
equation and how I developed it. By the time you finish reading
this article, I want you to create you own success equation,
believe in the factors you document and implement actions to be
successful.
My success equation (Success=F+F+F+O+P) involves five equal
factors.
* Faith - Believe in a higher presence
* Family - There is no greater priority
* Failure - Do not be afraid of failure, learn and grow from it
* Optimism - Maintain a positive outlook
* Perseverance - Relentlessly pursue your dreams and goals and
recognize opportunities
The first step in developing your equation is listing key factors
(words and phrases) that are important to you. Initially, put
down all your thoughts, then review and eliminate the less
critical ones until you have five to seven factors. To many or to
few may lead to conflicting decisions or priorities. This is why
I recommend you initially omit money from your equation, your
choice.
The second step is to review your factors during the next few
weeks as you interact with family, friends, business associates
etc. Document and carry with you your success equations during
this time fame. As you progress through your normal routine,
allow yourself time to reflect on the factors you have
identified. Ask yourself, are my decisions and actions are
consistent with these factors? Do I need to change my behavior or
maybe a factor? Keep notes; do not be quick to change anything
until at least a week has passed. This is your development and
learning period; there is no need to rush this step.
Third and final step is to critically review your success
equation. Look back through the notes and experiences from the
second step. Refine your success equation, document the final
result and carry it with you. That's it your on the way!
I close this article with one my favorite quotes from Pope John
Paul II, he said, "The future starts today, not tomorrow."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Kent Jacobson, a.k.a. "Mr. Success" is a trusted authority in the
success field and provides valuable success information for free
through his website at: http://www.Shortcut2Success.com . You can
also read Kent's Success Blog to find more success secrets at:
http://www.Shortcut2Success.com/blog
Time Management For Busy Moms
Copyright © 2006 Vasrue.com, All Rights Reserved
Written by: Jance Hayes
How do you do it? You work 40 hours a week, commute eight, cook,
clean, read bed time stories, help with homework, finagle home
finances and still have time for yourself and your spouse. Is
there an easier way? Before you peanut butter that gum out of
Sarah's hair or hunt down Cameron's pet rat, take a deep breath
and try these helpful time management tips:
1. Carpool. Chances are, there are some neighbor kids that
frantically dart out the door at the same time you are. Each of
these children have parents, as busy as you, and most would love
a break. Contact a few of them and arrange a carpool system.
Then, tote three to four kids to school one week, and have two to
three weeks off.
2. Casserole and Crock Pot. Too busy to cook every single night
after work? Make healthy casseroles the kids will love, like
macaroni and cheese, nutritious tuna or green bean casserole.
Also, use that crock pot: toss in some healthy ingredients in the
morning and go.
3. Prioritize. Can't possibly get it all done? Learn to
prioritize your to do list, putting less critical items at the
end. If you can't get to the less important items for a month or
more, that's okay. Let it go.
4. Delegate. Delegation is a critical time management skill. Are
the grandparents watching the kids next weekend and a birthday
bash just around the corner? Ask them to do the gift shopping.
Also, make sure each child also has chores to do everyday, and
that your spouse contributes his or her fair share.
5. Be Proactive. Are things a bit slow this week? You know it
never stays this calm. So take this opportunity to get ahead. Pay
bills in advance, prepare a week's worth of meals, finish the
less pressing to-do's and basically tie up all your loose ends.
Who'd have thought one child could add so much to one's
schedule. Parenting is daunting, to say the least. But with a
little finesse, you can accomplish it all - gracefully.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2006 Vasrue.com. All Rights Reserved.
Jance Hayes writes about Time Management. For more great
articles on this subject, come back to http://www.Vasrue.com.
Articles are published weekly on Travel, Real-Estate,
E-business, Credit and a host of other great topics.
In an effort to support other webmasters, http://www.Vasrue.com
is offering each article through RSS feed free of charge. Now
newspapers, ezines, magazines and independent websites can
effortlessly integrate fresh, captivating content in no time.
Each article is available for PDF download, RSS feed or browser
printing.
Written by: Jance Hayes
How do you do it? You work 40 hours a week, commute eight, cook,
clean, read bed time stories, help with homework, finagle home
finances and still have time for yourself and your spouse. Is
there an easier way? Before you peanut butter that gum out of
Sarah's hair or hunt down Cameron's pet rat, take a deep breath
and try these helpful time management tips:
1. Carpool. Chances are, there are some neighbor kids that
frantically dart out the door at the same time you are. Each of
these children have parents, as busy as you, and most would love
a break. Contact a few of them and arrange a carpool system.
Then, tote three to four kids to school one week, and have two to
three weeks off.
2. Casserole and Crock Pot. Too busy to cook every single night
after work? Make healthy casseroles the kids will love, like
macaroni and cheese, nutritious tuna or green bean casserole.
Also, use that crock pot: toss in some healthy ingredients in the
morning and go.
3. Prioritize. Can't possibly get it all done? Learn to
prioritize your to do list, putting less critical items at the
end. If you can't get to the less important items for a month or
more, that's okay. Let it go.
4. Delegate. Delegation is a critical time management skill. Are
the grandparents watching the kids next weekend and a birthday
bash just around the corner? Ask them to do the gift shopping.
Also, make sure each child also has chores to do everyday, and
that your spouse contributes his or her fair share.
5. Be Proactive. Are things a bit slow this week? You know it
never stays this calm. So take this opportunity to get ahead. Pay
bills in advance, prepare a week's worth of meals, finish the
less pressing to-do's and basically tie up all your loose ends.
Who'd have thought one child could add so much to one's
schedule. Parenting is daunting, to say the least. But with a
little finesse, you can accomplish it all - gracefully.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright (c) 2006 Vasrue.com. All Rights Reserved.
Jance Hayes writes about Time Management. For more great
articles on this subject, come back to http://www.Vasrue.com.
Articles are published weekly on Travel, Real-Estate,
E-business, Credit and a host of other great topics.
In an effort to support other webmasters, http://www.Vasrue.com
is offering each article through RSS feed free of charge. Now
newspapers, ezines, magazines and independent websites can
effortlessly integrate fresh, captivating content in no time.
Each article is available for PDF download, RSS feed or browser
printing.
Saturday, July 01, 2006
I know that!
The three most dangerous words in the English language are: I know that!
Those three words stop people in their tracks faster than a speeding train. As soon as we say, "I know that!" then we shut down to new growth. Humans were designed to be naturally curious and constantly growing beings, but as I always say, "If you're not growing, you are automatically dying."
Monday, June 12, 2006
Yes, You Can Be Financially Independent
By its very definition, financial independence means to not be dependent on anyone or anything for our financial needs. That requires being free from debt.
When asked what they would do if they won the lottery, most people say they would pay off their debts. Just imagine what it would be like not to owe any money!
We’d all like to be free from owing money. But something has happened to us over the past couple of generations—we’ve come to accept debt as just another part of modern life.
It doesn’t have to be that way.
The average American will earn between $600,000 and $2,000,000 in his or her lifetime. But it’s not important what we make—it’s what we keep that makes the difference. The percentage of people reaching 65 who are financially independent are in the small single digits. Over 25 percent of the US federal budget is used just to pay interest on the national debt. Debt has become the new “American Way” and it’s not something to be proud of.
Bankruptcies, failed marriages, alcohol and drug abuse, crime and a host of other things can often be related to the scourge of debt. Part of the reason we’ve embraced being in debt for most, if not all, of our lives can be attributed to the fact that everyone else—including our government—is doing it. Owing one, two or even three times as much as we earn in a year would have been horrifying to our grandparents. Had consumer debt—a term unheard of only 30 years ago—not crept into our society gradually, it never would have been embraced.
Just think what it would be like if you owed absolutely nothing to anyone for anything. All the payments you pay each month—all the interest, all the worry, the limited choices—would disappear. No more would you have to stay in a job or profession you despise with people you don’t respect. You would feel not only free from debt, but you would experience freedom in many other aspects of your life.
Imagine what your life would be like if you only had to pay for utilities, food and entertainment. Would it make a difference in the quality of your life, the quality of your relationships, your health? Of course it would.
We can all become debt-free and in less time than you might think. But first we have to get serious about it. It won’t happen by itself. The 40-40-40 plan won’t cut it. That’s working 40 hours a week, 40 years of your life and retiring at 40 percent of what you were making before.
Most people work into May of each year, just to pay their taxes to the state and federal government. How many more months do we have to work to pay the interest and principle payments on what we owe?
Let’s say that you owe $40,000—not counting your home mortgage—credit cards, furniture, cars, etc. If the average interest on this debt was 14 percent, you’d have to pay $5,600 just in interest each year. On top of that, of course, are principle payments. That could easily be another $5,000 to $10,000. Even if you were only paying $10,000 in payments on this debt, you would have to make over $13,000 before taxes to service this liability. If you made $35,000 annually, you’d be working almost five months of that year just to make your payments. Add to that the five months to pay taxes and what have you got left? Is that any way to live? No wonder so many people feel trapped.
How Do You Get There?
Getting out of debt and staying out of debt is simple. SIMPLE, but not always easy. I want to encourage and support you and your business to become debt-free. I’m confident that you will have more fun, encounter less stress and be more productive.
My wife and I have made our plan, we’ve simplified our lives, and we are well on our way to reaching this objective. Our company has no debt and we will personally be free of ALL debt in a short while. You can do it, too.
Debt-Free, then Wealth
Albert Einstein was once asked what he considered to be the greatest invention of all time. “Compound interest,” was his reply. When you’ve eliminated your debts, you can then start to use this “great invention” and make compound interest work FOR you instead of against you. You will develop an investment portfolio that can make you truly wealthy in only a few years. You can become a true capitalist in the real sense of the word—one who creates capital. And you will be free.
You owe it to yourself and those you love to free yourself from the power-robbing, creativity-stifling, worry-causing scourge of debt. After that, you can begin to develop real wealth.
Related Resource
In a separate message, I tell you about a proven and surprisingly simple way to get on top of your finances. I've also arranged a substantial discount for you. http://SuccessNet.org/go/leoquinn.htm
CHANGING THOUGHT PATTERNS IS VITAL TO SUCCESSFUL WEIGHT LOSS
Diet choices are endless. As you scan the newsstands, every magazine touts its answers to successful weight loss. Eat this, eliminate that. Some are extreme, some are fairly healthy, but most do not work long term. In fact, statistics show that 90 percent of those who lose weight regain. What then is the solution?
Successful weight loss and long-term maintenance require lifestyle changes. The most critical of these changes is your thinking -- the way you think about food, the thoughts that lead to eating.
Consider this: A thought becomes an action that becomes a habit. And a habit becomes who you are. Most every action in life is preceded by a thought. A few of the body's functions do not require thought, yet thought can affect them. Breathing, blood pressure, heart rate, digestion, even pain and healing can be influenced by thought. One's mind is the incredible power that enables the body to function. From birth, our minds have been programmed by experiences, knowledge and opinions. Many of our thoughts and attitudes also have been programmed into our minds.
Children will eat when hungry or as their bodies require. Sometimes children will eat ravenously, sometimes they will on pick, as they respond to the appestat (the body's internal trigger that signals the brain when we are full). When our children's appetites fluctuate (or they respond to their appestat), we are often uncomfortable thinking it's not healthy or normal. In addition to insisting that our children eat, we often choose the portions. We even threaten: “Thousands are going hungry” or “Sit there until your plate is clean.” We begin early to desensitize the body's appestat and regular eating patterns.
Our family's eating habits become ours, healthy or not. Food often becomes a partner with fun or a reward. A banquet is given in honor of accomplishment. As a treat, we go out to dinner. If a child is good, we promise a treat. Food becomes the focal point of everyday life, and we begin to live to eat.
With so much emphasis on food, compounded by the food industry, which makes the convenience of processed, packaged food so enticing, how do we change our lifestyle? How do we change our thoughts about food?
Our minds, like computers, can be reprogrammed. We can empty the old files and enter new data. We can change our thoughts.
Becoming aware of WHY we eat is the first step toward cleaning out and reprogramming the "computer." Do you eat when you are sad or depressed? Do you eat because you are bored? Or do you deliberately skip meals, leaving yourself starved and out of control at the end of the day? Do you eat to dull the senses, easing some of life's challenges much as an alcoholic does? Do you eat on the run or in a hurry, short-circuiting the appestat and therefore not acknowledging that you're full until you've overdone it.
Does guilt over "blowing" your diet lead to a binge? Do you give into grandma's pie to avoid hurting her feelings? Or maybe that craving ends in the consumption of too many unwise calories. A simple fleeting thought takes on a life of its own when we continue to dwell on it. A piece of this or that would sure taste good. And that thought becomes an overwhelming obsession as we give it more power and ultimately give in.
What we think about we bring about. The thoughts given the most time and attention become our reality. Those thoughts also may run toward our ability to lose weight. Been there, done that...failed. Maybe no one supported or believed in you. Or worse yet, maybe you've been told you come from "fat genes" or you're big-boned, so deal with it, accept it. You’ve tried every diet and your mind is flooded with frustration, discouragement and failure.
Let's turn it around. Become aware of your self-talk. What do you say to yourself? Are the words “can,” “will” and “choose” dominant in your thoughts? I've learned the way it hasn't worked. Now I choose to change my thinking, my actions and my habits.
You fill in the blanks with a new positive action remembering the motto “I eat to live.” When sad, I ______________. When depressed, I ________________. When happy, I celebrate by _____________________. Affirm daily, this thought: “I live a healthy lifestyle.”
Bottom line, your calorie intake must equal the calories you burn to maintain your weight loss, fewer calories to lose. Physical activity is critical to keeping the body healthy and the metabolism high. Our bodies are designed to move! Choose a healthy diet plan or create one that works for you. Know your motivation for losing.
Educate yourself about nutrition, eat healthy and in moderation. Find a buddy to support you. www.Weightlossbuddy.com is a great site to explore. Reward your successes and believe in yourself. Replace negative beliefs with the knowledge that you can and will succeed!
Remember, without a healthy body, the mind has no vehicle. Without your health, what is life?
YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS!! YOU CAN SUCCEED!!
Barb Zercher conducts seminars and workshops and is a freelance writer and a life coach. She has studied and researched the psychology of success, self-improvement and communication for nearly 20 years. Barb is also a Certified Hypnotherapist as well as an NLP. When asked what she does, her response is, "I help others turn their dreams into reality." She may be reached at bzcoac@aol.com. Or check out her website www.BarbaraZercher-MindsinMotion.com
Successful weight loss and long-term maintenance require lifestyle changes. The most critical of these changes is your thinking -- the way you think about food, the thoughts that lead to eating.
Consider this: A thought becomes an action that becomes a habit. And a habit becomes who you are. Most every action in life is preceded by a thought. A few of the body's functions do not require thought, yet thought can affect them. Breathing, blood pressure, heart rate, digestion, even pain and healing can be influenced by thought. One's mind is the incredible power that enables the body to function. From birth, our minds have been programmed by experiences, knowledge and opinions. Many of our thoughts and attitudes also have been programmed into our minds.
Children will eat when hungry or as their bodies require. Sometimes children will eat ravenously, sometimes they will on pick, as they respond to the appestat (the body's internal trigger that signals the brain when we are full). When our children's appetites fluctuate (or they respond to their appestat), we are often uncomfortable thinking it's not healthy or normal. In addition to insisting that our children eat, we often choose the portions. We even threaten: “Thousands are going hungry” or “Sit there until your plate is clean.” We begin early to desensitize the body's appestat and regular eating patterns.
Our family's eating habits become ours, healthy or not. Food often becomes a partner with fun or a reward. A banquet is given in honor of accomplishment. As a treat, we go out to dinner. If a child is good, we promise a treat. Food becomes the focal point of everyday life, and we begin to live to eat.
With so much emphasis on food, compounded by the food industry, which makes the convenience of processed, packaged food so enticing, how do we change our lifestyle? How do we change our thoughts about food?
Our minds, like computers, can be reprogrammed. We can empty the old files and enter new data. We can change our thoughts.
Becoming aware of WHY we eat is the first step toward cleaning out and reprogramming the "computer." Do you eat when you are sad or depressed? Do you eat because you are bored? Or do you deliberately skip meals, leaving yourself starved and out of control at the end of the day? Do you eat to dull the senses, easing some of life's challenges much as an alcoholic does? Do you eat on the run or in a hurry, short-circuiting the appestat and therefore not acknowledging that you're full until you've overdone it.
Does guilt over "blowing" your diet lead to a binge? Do you give into grandma's pie to avoid hurting her feelings? Or maybe that craving ends in the consumption of too many unwise calories. A simple fleeting thought takes on a life of its own when we continue to dwell on it. A piece of this or that would sure taste good. And that thought becomes an overwhelming obsession as we give it more power and ultimately give in.
What we think about we bring about. The thoughts given the most time and attention become our reality. Those thoughts also may run toward our ability to lose weight. Been there, done that...failed. Maybe no one supported or believed in you. Or worse yet, maybe you've been told you come from "fat genes" or you're big-boned, so deal with it, accept it. You’ve tried every diet and your mind is flooded with frustration, discouragement and failure.
Let's turn it around. Become aware of your self-talk. What do you say to yourself? Are the words “can,” “will” and “choose” dominant in your thoughts? I've learned the way it hasn't worked. Now I choose to change my thinking, my actions and my habits.
You fill in the blanks with a new positive action remembering the motto “I eat to live.” When sad, I ______________. When depressed, I ________________. When happy, I celebrate by _____________________. Affirm daily, this thought: “I live a healthy lifestyle.”
Bottom line, your calorie intake must equal the calories you burn to maintain your weight loss, fewer calories to lose. Physical activity is critical to keeping the body healthy and the metabolism high. Our bodies are designed to move! Choose a healthy diet plan or create one that works for you. Know your motivation for losing.
Educate yourself about nutrition, eat healthy and in moderation. Find a buddy to support you. www.Weightlossbuddy.com is a great site to explore. Reward your successes and believe in yourself. Replace negative beliefs with the knowledge that you can and will succeed!
Remember, without a healthy body, the mind has no vehicle. Without your health, what is life?
YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS!! YOU CAN SUCCEED!!
Barb Zercher conducts seminars and workshops and is a freelance writer and a life coach. She has studied and researched the psychology of success, self-improvement and communication for nearly 20 years. Barb is also a Certified Hypnotherapist as well as an NLP. When asked what she does, her response is, "I help others turn their dreams into reality." She may be reached at bzcoac@aol.com. Or check out her website www.BarbaraZercher-MindsinMotion.com
Observe Your Own Mind So You Can Stop Feeling as If Beliefs Just 'Happen' to You.
If it feels as if your beliefs just show up fully developed and you have nothing to do with how they came to be a part of you, it's because you've not developed the ability to observe your own mind.
Yet most of your beliefs were probably "absorbed" from your family when you were younger. The rest of them have been gleaned from the community you grew up in and from the culture at large. The process of acquiring them was invisible to you, so you didn't notice you were doing it.
President John F. Kennedy once said, "Too often we hold fast to the clichés of our forebears. We subject all facts to a prefabricated set of interpretations. We enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought."
Be willing to endure that discomfort of thought. Gaining awareness and accepting personal responsibility for your beliefs and behaviors is an acquired skill. If it wasn't demonstrated for you when you were growing up, or you haven't intentionally studied it, chances are you haven't a clue about how to do it.
Your Statement of Truth. A start is to recognize what personal responsibility is not. In the absence of personal responsibility, all you can do is blame others for your difficulties because it looks to you as if they *are* to blame.
But when you assume radical personal responsibility, you live in a truth that proclaims,
I am responsible for how I allow others to affect me. In a world of forces beyond my control, I can learn to be the keeper of my own heart and mind.
Even when things appear not to be going my way, and I am upon an emotional sea of crossing and diverging currents, I can still navigate my way to my ultimate good fortune.
I proclaim that I am not a victim of the world I see. I am a co-creator of it.
Let love and wisdom be my moral compass, and let clarity be the wind in my sails.
Layne and Paul Cutright
Build Credibility
Says John Caple, author of Trust Me: Building Credibility in Business and In Life: "You can get people to trust you if you share your goals, are specific, show that you mean it, share the accolades, ask for input, put it out there, trust your dreams, appeal to all the senses, be candid, be like Lincoln, find something to be authentically humble about, don't hide what's going on in your life outside work, be open about where you are in your growth cycle, talk about momentum, create tests to prove your friendship, admit mistakes, and be honest about your emotions."
*** Article: The Power of Appreciation – By Noelle Nelson ***
You hate your supervisor. There--you finally said it. You’ve been
pussyfooting around it (and her) for long enough now. That’s it, you’ve
had it! Let the truth be told--you hate your boss.
Your reflection in the mirror scowls back at you. You sigh, stop waving
your toothbrush around, and stick it back in your mouth where it belongs.
Fat lot of good that did! You still have to go to work today. You still
have to face your supervisor. You still have to go along with whatever she
says.
The worst of it is that you love your job! You have no desire to quit. You
work for a great company, you enjoy your work, the pay is good, you get
along fine with your coworkers--the only downside is your supervisor. But
oh, what a downside! Her automatic answer to anything you want is no; her
automatic expectation of anything she wants is yes. So, you don’t get help
when you need it, you don’t get a recommendation for that new position,
and you don’t get vacation when you want it. You DO, however, have to
respond with, “How high?” when she says, “Jump!”
The question is, how do you keep your job without losing your sanity?
Love thine enemy.
No, not “love thine enemy” as in plaster a phony smile on your face and
pretend that your supervisor is a great person to work with--she’s not!
No, this is “love thine enemy” as in APPRECIATE your supervisor, VALUE
something about your supervisor. Deliberately look for one thing, however
small, that you find worthwhile about her. Maybe it’s that she’s always
straight with you. Maybe it’s that she works as long and as hard as she
expects you to. Maybe it’s that she challenges you to the very limits of
your abilities.
You see, that’s the true meaning of appreciation. It’s not just another
word for gratitude, a polite “thank you” after someone’s done something
nice for you, but appreciation as valuing. That’s actually the basis of
how the word appreciate is used in the marketplace: we say that art
appreciates in worth, land appreciates, gold appreciates--they all
increase in value, and appreciation is first and foremost about valuing.
The thoughts you think, when you are appreciating someone or something,
are thoughts about their worth, their value to you, what they mean to you,
and why they matter.
Back to your supervisor. You know that one thing you found that you can
really, truly value about her? Focus on that. For a couple weeks, as best
you can, every time you see your supervisor, think about what it is you
value about her. If she’s been ornery with you, try to let go of your
upset feelings as quickly as you can and--you guessed it--focus once again
on thoughts of valuing her.
What you think and feel about someone impacts how they think and feel
about you. It’s actually scientific. Quantum physics teaches us that in
the realm of energy, like attracts like. You’ve felt this yourself many
times. When someone’s angry and yelling at you, you’ll want to snap back
in return. When someone is kind and generous toward you, you’ll want to be
giving toward them. Think of appreciation as a wonderful facilitator of
energy. When you genuinely appreciate someone, they become more willing to
cooperate with you.
How will this work with your supervisor? Well, the first thing that will
happen, as you persistently, consistently value your supervisor, is that
your opinion of your supervisor will shift. You’ll realize that she rides
you hard because she really cares about the success of the company. You’ll
realize that she doesn’t like shifting around vacation schedules because
she takes great pride in the smooth running of her department. You’ll
understand that she doesn’t give you that recommendation to a new position
because she wants to keep your good work in her department. As you
persistently, consistently value your supervisor in this way, she will
feel that shift and begin to value you and thus treat your requests
differently.
What about in your home life? Would this same concept apply? You betcha!
For example, when you first fall in love, you may be delighted by your
sweetheart’s mellow, easy-going approach to life, which nicely balances
out your wired, get-it-done-now approach. Six months down the line,
however, when something isn’t happening the way you want it to, you
redefine his “don’t worry, be happy,” laid-back attitude as laziness.
Your sweetheart hasn’t changed, but how you view him has. In the same way,
your “just do it, and do it now” approach was something your mate admired
in you--until it meant that you expected him to do something he wasn’t in
the mood to do (mellow soul that he is), whereupon your decisiveness
became “controlling,” and you become “bitchy.” You haven’t changed either,
but your sweetheart’s perception of you has.
How you view your true love is affected by how you feel in the moment.
When you feel wronged, upset, or hurt by your mate, you are likely to
forget what endears him to you and focus only on what displeases you. For
example, you may ignore how loving your mate is with the kids and focus
only on what a slob he is. Both are true. Your sweetheart may ignore how
well you handle the family finances and focus only on how you can’t stand
the sports he loves. Both are true.
When you focus on what you don’t like, don’t value, or don’t cherish about
your sweetheart, you feel resentment. With resentment comes a diminishment
of love. On the other hand, when you focus on what you do like, do value,
and do cherish, you feel love. The love, or lack of it all, stems from
what you choose to make significant. That’s where appreciation steps in.
If you deliberately, proactively choose to focus on what you value about
your mate as much and as often as you possibly can, you’ll find that the
love in your life just grows and grows. Appreciation is a cornerstone of
love, one of its most important elements.
Science increasingly shows how interrelated we all are and how we affect
each other continuously in both conscious and unconscious ways. Make that
interrelatedness work for you. Value everyone in your life, and enjoy the
benefits of their valuing you in return.
Ah, the power of appreciation!
About the Author:
This article was written by Dr. Noelle Nelson, contributing author to "101
Great Ways to Improve Your Life." Psychologist, best-selling author, and
speaker, Dr. Noelle has empowered countless individuals to be happier,
healthier, and more successful at work, at home, and in
relationships--drawn from her belief that through the power of
appreciation we can accomplish great things. Visit her at
http://www.PowerOfAppreciation.net
Her article above is one of 101 great chapters that can be found in "101
Great Ways to Improve Your Life." This powerful compilation book with Zig
Ziglar, Brian Tracy, Jim Rohn, and Denis Waitley contains 101 chapters of
proven advice on how to improve your life.
*** If you purchase just one copy of their new book today, you will also
receïve $1,500 worth of valuable bonus gifts. To see this special book
package, please visit http://www.selfgrowth.com/greatwaysbook.html
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